Do you know who you are?
by Watch Your Six
Summary: I have never known happiness. Have never felt save... and the way the Slytherins behaved towards me was not something I wasn't used to. To be honest, it was actually bearable compared to how I was treaded my whole life. But why couldn't I have one bit happiness, why not fall in love and be loved in return? Why not be free of all fear and live openly? Cause everyone would hate me...
1. Prologue

The cold air cut into her lungs as she ran.

It was so difficult to keep going, to continue to breath, but she had to go on!

Never had she felt such a fear, never had she dared to rebel. It was her only hope, flee or die trying!

She couldn't go back. Couldn't take anymore. All this pain and hate she had to endure there, all the scars they gave her, of course not where anyone could see them. The daily threats, all the night she stayed awake because of pure fear. Fear of being 'punished' again, being tugged down to the dungeons and locked in there for mere days, without warmth or food. Just some ice cold water had she been given.

No, she wouldn't go back, she would kill herself or someone else if she had to, but never return to hell on earth!

The mud flew in every direction as she fell hard onto the ground. Maybe she should have taken the path. _No_ , she reminded herself, _they would find me there easier_!

She heaved herself upright and felt a sudden pain in her ankle. She suppressed a scream and tried again to stand on two feet. It hurt like hell but she had no choice. With klenched teeth she continued her way across the field. Soon would she reach the forest.

 _Maybe... maybe there is someone who can help me..._ she hoped and knew how stupid her thoughts were but hope was all that kept her going. For hours she limped through the forest, nearly blinded by pain and the cold that felt like it had completely consumed her, was shaking her and making it even harder to go on.

Only a few miles, not at all the night through as planed, could she walk before she would fade. She knew it, knew she would most likely die out here in the cold. At least she would die as a free person. The thought made her smile and she walk as fast as she could.

Not an hour later was she holding onto a tree, searching for support. She sensed that she reached her limit and almost gave up, when she suddenly saw a light. Trying to focus her view she could make out a small town in the dark, not too far away!

'Thank, Merlin!' she murmered and forced her legs forward with sheer power of will. There just had to be someone who could help her. If it was only a warm bed for a few hours or something to eat, oh how she craved for some warm...

Her scream pierced through the night. She hadn't seen the sharp ascent. She rolled downwards, unable to get a hold on something she slammed against trees and rocks, rolling faster and faster. Suddenly the ascent ended, but she kept rolling due to the push.

She saw the rock coming, couldn't stop, a sharp pain on her head, then...nothing but blackness.

Hello guys, this is the prologue of a story I had in my mind for a long time. I finally decided to write it down, maybe you like it.

I apologise for any spelling or writing mistakes, I'm still searching for a beta! If you would like to read chapters before anyone else, please send me a PM.

As usual: I don't own Harry Potter, it all J. (I just play with it and insert a few minor things, like my character ;) )

Good night,

WYS


	2. Chapter 1

**Hello hey and Hi!**

 **I haven't updated this story in a long time :/ before it even began, Sorry!**

 **So just a short info: This is a non-con fic! It is AFTER the war is over. Hogwarts was rebuild and the usually known characters are back to take their final and EIGHT year. Snape is still alive as he survived the attack of nagini. Being the master of poison and poitions he is.**

 **I do not own Harry Potter, it belongs to J. K. Rowling! I just add my crazyness to it ;p**

 **So I hope you enjoy this first chapter, as here isn't much happening. But I want to start this slow.**

 **By the way; I apologize ahead for any spelling mistakes or wrong grammar. English is not my mother tongue and I still am in dire need for a beta!**

 **Love,**

 **WYS**

The tap tap of her shoes was the only sound to be heard along the hall. The flames lit the hall sparely and Medira saw human silhouettes in every shadow. Why had the dungeons to be so damn spooky. Why the hell had she been sorted in the Syltherin house?!

Medira clutched the books tightly to her chest. It had been a mistake to stay that long in the library, but it was better to stay there than to be in the common room. If everybody would just ignore her, it would be perfectly fine, but no, they had far too much fun in reminding her of how low she stood. How far beneath them because of her dirty blood. It got so bad, that even people from other houses noticed how she was treaded. But she survived worse. The name calling, the stealing or destroying of her stuff, especially her homework, the few shoves into walls, even throwing her books in the dirt... it meant nothing to her, she was used to much worse and didn't give a shit. She just preferred to study in peace. But as a first year she was given strict rules and she definitely broke those rules by staying out of her dorm that long, past curfew actually. But she had done all her homework and found a book on shielding charms. She got so caught up in the possibility of protecting herself with magic, that she simply forgot time. Because she was sitting in a hidden corner, she couldn't even look out for other people to leave, no one was near her. Even Mme Pinse didn't realize that there was one student left in the library. It bothered Medira in no way, she was happy to be able to just keep reading.

Most of her life she wasn't allowed to use magic, to actually be a witch. But now, oh dear merlin, what she could learn! What magical beings where capable of! It amazed her to no end and she wanted to learn so much, taking in every bit of knowledge this school, Hogwarts, had to offer. Yes, it was hard being a Slytherin with no pureblood family name or even being a bastard to any known family, but that wouldn't keep her from her one and only goal: Become stronger! Be the strongest witch ever known and no one will ever be able to hurt you again! _He_ wouldn't be able to so much as lay a hand on her! Medira smiled slightly at that thought. What would all those spoiled brats be, when she had achieved her goal? No more than dirt under her nails! Learning everything Hogwarts taught would take seven years, years she gladly spent here, even thou she had no friends. Hogwarts was supposed to be the safest place in whole England. And that was exactly the place she wanted to be. To finally learn how to use her magic was just a bonus.

It was now 2 months into the term and she was already ahead of her class. Well that was not actually a surprise since she had the mind of a seventeen year old that was pushed into the body of an eleven year old girl. Yes, Hogwarts was the safest place in England, but it was still better to glamour her and change her name. At least that was what the Headmistress McGonagall said. It would be attracting to much attention to suddenly have a seventeen year old to study with the first classes. _He_ would hear of her. It would be too easy for him, like a stupid sign saying: Here I am, come and take me back to hell! _Never!_ Screamed her mind.

She was so distracted, that she missed the tall person rounding the corner just before her. She almost collided with him, but he had suddenly a death grip on her shoulder and Medira froze.

'Out after curfew, Tabler? 10 points from Slytherin.' He said in this cool and smooth voice of his. It always gave her shivers and she couldn't quite figure out by now if those shivers were good or bad.

She cautiously looked up at him. He was so much taller than her, not only because she was smaller than her usual 5'5'', he towered over most students, he was at least 6'5''! How she had missed him was beyond her, his platinum blond hair even seemed to glow in the dark, shining slightly golden in the light of the flames.

'I'm s-s-sorry, Sir. M-Mr Malfoy.' She stuttered out.

'It's Prefect. No Sir and no Mr Malfoy, got that?' His eyes looked like cold steel, she he was angry they looked like storm clouds were captured in his eyes. He quirked an eyebrow, waiting for her answer.

'Oh, ahem, yes, S... eh, Prefect.' She answered shyly while staring at her feet. He was intimidating in every way. His height, his eyes and the cold demeanor he always surrounded himself with. The fucking way he walk and even his stupid family name. Everyone in Slytherin looked up to him. The girls wanted him and the guys wanted to be like him. But he separated himself from all of them. He seemed to enjoy silence as much as she did. He was sitting with friends at their table during the meals thou, he had always a seat offered in the center of the common room with all other eight and seven years, but mostly he sat by himself in a far corner. Sometimes he seemed to be in a whole different world and sometimes she could tell, that he was watching. Not only her, his unyielding view saw everything.

'Go to bed. Next time I will take 20 points!' His voice vibrated through her, pulled her back into the here and now.

'Yes Prefect.' She muttered and stepped around him. Her steps now more hurriedly, she was nearly at the hidden entrance to Slytherin's common room. Her heart was beating rapidly in her chest, as always when he got near. It was so weird. She was sure he mostly saw through her, like she wasn't there, but then... when he did actually see her, his view was so all-pervasive, as if he could see right into her soul. Like he knew of her secret... No, no one except the Headmistress and Professor Snape knew!

But he sure as hell knew that something was off about her!  
 _I have to be more careful around him_ , she thought. She reached the portrait and muttered the password 'Pure Blood' while rolling her eyes.

She hurried to her dorm and saw that all the other girls were already asleep. _Good for me_ , she smiled to herself and climbed on her bed. She would just read a few pages of her potions book and then go to sleep.

But sleep overcame her before she even finished one page. Still in her uniform, Medira fell into an uneasy slumber.

 **Ok guys, I hope you enjoyed it. Let me now what you think :)**


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